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Tuesday, 9 August 2011

The Day Society Imploded

The scenes on the television, the noises in the street, fear fills most, but those few, those idiotic few, have found something else, a new found lust for destruction, for theft and anarchy. This is not 1981, this is 2011. Under a year until this proud country plays host to the top athletes and invites the world to join us for the greatest spectacle in the world... the 2012 Olympic Games.

Some may blame this on the death of one man from London. Mr Duggan, a father of four, was shot in Ferry Lane, Tottenham, north London, on Thursday, as officers attempted to make an arrest. There may be no evidence to suggest Mr. Duggan opened fire on the officers, but a gun was found on the scene. What was to come next could not have been predicted... Some of the worst scenes Britain has seen for many years.

Since Saturday England has been plagued by the complete devastation of buildings, looting of stock and the abuse of the police force. Starting in London that terrible night, we have seen shops burnt to the ground, once of course everything in there had been stolen, and groups of hundreds if not thousands of young people uprising against the people we put our faith in every day to protect us and our streets.

But where exactly were the police? It is clear to see that the situation was not handled as well as it could have and should have been. Many people have been interviewed and quoted as saying that they rang for the police, in desperate need of assistance, and, sadly, their calls were not answered. Youths left to their on devices, youths that without a doubt should not have been out at such times of the night as 3a.m when the riots were still going on.

So what or who is to blame? Were the police too trigger happy, were the police too slow to react to the uprising we are still seeing 4 days later? Are these just a collection of Britain's scum? Are we seeing an eventual reaction to the financial turmoil we see the world's economy in? Well if not the answer, I do know one thing... This may be the beginning of a sad and sorry end to society as we know it.

Wolverhampton, West Bromwich, Bristol, Birmingham, Manchester, and several areas of London sit in devastation and turmoil. Society is in a downward spiral and as the economy fails, and the government fail to act accordingly, there is one outlet, one service that has thrived, and sadly it has thrived in the worst way... Social networking has provided a way for the scum of Britain to get in touch and coordinate attacks and riots. On the 9th of August 2011 perhaps the saddest and most disgraceful Facebook request was published... One sad, pathetic, horrific person organised for people to meet at 5pm at Salford Shopping Centre in Manchester to 'Steal Things'. A sad day for us all I think you'll agree.

What is this answer? How do we fight this issue? How can you stop this when there are people, men and women, aged everything between 7 and 47 ignoring every social norm, all respect for people around them and joining together to fight against the very people who are here to keep you safe? Plastic Bullets has been tipped as the best answer. But if this was America we wouldn't just see riot police trying to calm things down, the Army would be in, the real bullets would be out, and lives, however sad it may be, would be lost... But our police force are not allowed to do this. Bring out the water cannon? Not a chance says Theresa May.

The 6,000 brave men and women in the police force who were battling the crowds up until today, has now been raised to 16,000 police officers on the streets to try and nip this in the bud as soon as possible. To the Police Officers who are risking their lives to stop this nightmare, I commend you, you are brave, and brilliant, but you are too late. The government's decision to delay this move, to not decide upon this until the 4th day, has let down those tax paying, honest citizens of Britain who have seen their homes destroyed and work places looted. Mr. Cameron you have let us down. Bring in what Army forces we haven't shipped out to fight yet, bring in the water cannons and plastic bullets, bring in an early curfew, bring in trucheons and tear gas, where is our Zero Tolerance to gang crime now?

111 of those brave officers who have put themselves in danger in the line of duty have been injured, people have been stabbed, shot, killed, and what is happening? Not a lot!

In this social networking world, our imperfect society has come undone. A faltering economy, a lack of opportunity for young people, and friction between the police and gangs around London have all been quoted as reasons for this nightmare, but I have some facts to add, some home truths that, thanks to this horrific time have been made aware;

  • What are the parents of these youths doing? Children being allowed, some maybe encouraged to go out and join the madness, by parents who will probably sit on benefits, drinking their sorry lives away.
  • The government has failed to react in a strong manner to combat the obvious uprising. The coalition has once more let us down in our times of need.
  • The youth crime culture that has haunted our streets since the birth of the 'chav' has not been dealt with.

These sorry truths are now haunting us, and this, without a shadow of a doubt, needs to stop. These are not riots, this is not a reaction to the death of Mr. Duggan on Thursday. This is not Brixton Riots. This is the thuggish, yob, youth culture rising up, from their low IQ, Jeremy Kyle, Strong Cider, no qualification lives, and taking what is not theirs. People's livelihoods they have worked for. People's homes they have earned. People's history and future gone within days of sheer idiocy and anarchy.

A few right steps have been taken to stop this devastation; fast-track courts have been opened to see the criminals put to justice. Plastic Bullets are being given to the brave police who's numbers are gladly being increased to stem this mayhem.

This has been a sad time for our society. We no longer stand as a proud country, but a country ashamed of the people we see around us acting in such a shameful way.

Thanks to Twitter, Facebook and BlackBerry Messenger, this has surely become the biggest organised crime case in history.

My fellow educated people, let us all come together, as the scum has, but instead of destroying people's lives, let us join together to correct all the wrongs of these sad people.

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

And The Award Goes To......

Afternoon Bloggers,
So after 9 months in the sun, i only have 5 days remaining in the place that i have come to call home... Cadiz. Like at the end of all great seasons, football, film, music, music and television, there comes the awards. And with the end of the Cadiz blog very close, this is no different.

So by selecting the most appropriate of awards from the BAFTAS and Oscar's, it is my proud priveledge to announce the nominations and results for the Academy of Cadiz Erasmus Awards 2011 (ACEA)

But first thing i have to mention the amazing 3 weeks i have had since we last spoke, things have really taken off here in Cadiz, a moment too late, blink, and its now over! First visitor was Craig 'The Lad' Morrison, a week in the sort of sun with him, drinking and partying hard, loving life with an old freind, reminscing of times gone by. Then came Charlotte, one of my best friends in the world, and who i had an amazing weekend with, also with one of her close friends Scouse Jade. Then arrived Claire, here for a week, one of the best weeks ever, hand down, and our first real amaount of time together, amazing! Then she was gone and for a day i was alone, no visitors here to rid the sadness from my bones, but just around the corner was a big ball of banter.... James Walsh, the Youtube Legend and loyal reader ond feature of this Blog, and this week with him, (now longer as he has cooly extended his stay to go home with me!!!!) has been truly sensational.

On top of the visitors, the business has been going swimmingly, Erasmus payed us a nice amount for our Uni lifestyle here, exams have gone well and the sun has been blazing down beautifully!


Best Male in a Leading Role:
  • Michael McPherson in the rollercoaster RomCom 'The Dark Kike'
  • Max Sturridge in the hilarious Inbetweeners-esque 'Why Won't It Work?'
  • Ashley Milns in the reoccuring nightmare of 'Floppy'
  • Matthew Stevens in the Glittery madness of 'Carnaval'
And the Award, after much deliberation, goes to Ashley Milns for his dedication to the cause, narrowly beating out Matty's drinking dedication to the Prize

Best Female in a Leading Role:
  • Katie Bilton in the knackering 'The Italian Job'
  • Maisie Kennedy in the risque Cadiz slot of 'The L Word'
  • Kellie Westerman in The Painfully awkward 'Slam: A Tale of Two Doors'
  • Laura Payne in The mystery departure RomCom 'For a Boy!'
And the Award, for Best Female in a Leading Role, for Cadiz 2011, goes to, for her consistency over the long time spent filming and her commitment to the cause, Katie Bilton, narrowly beating out Kellie Westerman in her hilarious role in Slam.

Best Male in a Supporting Role:
  • Lucas Uhold in the exciting 'Fight Club'
  • Dave Smith in 'For a Boy!'
  • Alex Coyne in the seaside college comedy 'Fraturday'
  • Mathew Clarke in the drag queen thriller 'Halloween'
And the award, for Best Male in a Supporting Role, goes to, and this was a difficult one, they all performed so well, but in the end, due to comedy value, the award goes to Dave Smith for his persistent annoyance of Laura Payne in For A Boy.

Best Female in a Supporting Role:
  • Kellie Westerman in 'The Dark Kike'
  • Bee Heal improving her Spanish in 'International Relations'
  • Kate Newman for her portrayal of Max's supportive friend in 'Why Won't it Work?'
  • Lucy Robinson in the Crime Drama 'The BBQ Thief'
And the award, after changing my mind 4 times, each person having recieved it at least once in my mind, goes to, for her delicate, under-the-radar portrayal of a predator, Bee Heal.

Best Newcomer:
  • Craig Morrison in the Hangover-esque 'The American'
  • James Walsh in the alcohol fueled 'Vomatron'
  • Mael M'Baye making a brilliant cameo in 'Carnaval'
  • Abi Housden in the chilled sofa comedy 'Connect Four'.
And the winner, coming out of nowhere to grab not only the girl, but the award here is Craig Morrison.

Makeup and Hair Design:
  • Matthew Stevens for his Yellow, Gold and Silver outings in 'Carnaval'
  • Matthew Stevens in his sexy Nurse costume and Red Hair in 'Halloween'
  • Mathew Clarke in Blonde and PVC as a slutty Nurse in 'Halloween'
  • Sam Maloney giving his best 'Suited Up' attempt in 'Granada Couture'
After much discussion between myself and me, erm, the award, although i somehow came last in this category, goes to Mathew Stevens for his role in Halloween, a ghastly mess which looked somehow scarily perfect.

Best Moment in Drama:
  • Kellie Westerman slams the door in Mike's face in 'Slam...' the painful prequel to 'The Dark Kike'
  • Katie Bilton hobbling to the Hospital during 'Carnaval' madness
  • Katie Bilton susses Me and Claire out in Umec in the edge of your seat romance 'Risky Business'
  • Lucas Uhold drops broken legged Fausto mid HelicopterMan in 'Fight Club'
And the award, in a tough category in which any of the 3 people from the four moments could have snatched the award...... goes to...... Katie Bilton for her brilliant sisterly nouse which helped her to suss out mine and Claire's relationship, 3 days after it began!

Best Moment in Comedy:
  • Lucas Uhold running around in 'Carnaval' dressed as a gay bee
  • Mike McPherson getting kicked out of Granada 10 topless in 'Granada Couture'
  • Laura Payne picking her sick out of her sink and throwing it our of her window in 'For a Boy'
  • Ash Milns pissing himself in the street outside our hostel in the opening scenes of 'Slam...'
  • James Southam for his inability to stand up in Magdala in '1 Tequila, 2 Tequila....'
Like all great comedy moments these four had the magic formula, great participants, the shock value, perfect timing, and the hilarity factor. One of the hardest decisions so far, but after taking time out to let my mind wander back to these great moments, the award goes to..... Laura Payne for her shockingly gross puking incident.

Best Original Storyline:
  • Mike McPherson and Kellie Westerman's Kike romance in 'The Dark Kike'
  • 'Carnaval' opening weekend madness
  • Granada weekend in 'Granada Couture'
  • Portugal Road Trip in 'Four go Car-Boating' 
All four of these were perhaps the most brilliant, random and enjoyable of times here in Cadiz, out of nowhere these occured, from Mike and Kellie's love, Carnaval's manic opening weekend, The brilliant weekend celebrating Tash and Mike's birthdays in Granada or the Road Trip in which Myself, Tash, Katie and Ash almost sank in floods on our way to having an amazing time travelling to and from Portugal in one day. However a winner must be chosen, and by the hair on my nose, the award goes to Granada Couture for giving us a great weekend in Granada, partying, hanging and seeing the beautiful sights.

Best Adapted Storyline:
  • 'Halloween' costume madness
  • Sam Maloney's inability to pay the right amount at a restaurant in 'Special Sam'
  • 'Carnaval' closing weekend madness
  • Erasmus new arrivals in 'Welcome to the Free Life'
Each of these great storylines could have knicked it, each one a shadow of another great time before, but in the end, because of consistency, annoyance, comic value and how it sticks in your memories, the award goes to Sam Maloney for his, A in Maths ALevel or not, inability to add up his items on a bill and pay the correct amount for his meals.

Best Director:
  • Mathew Clarke for Directing England's World Cup Futbol Sala win in '3 Lion Glory'
  • Matthew Stevens for Directing Cadiz's Erasmus Futbol Sala win in 'Malaga Mayhem'
  • Lucas Uhold's HelicopterMan in 'Fight Club'
  • Katie Bilton's directional struggle to keep Matty Stevens' shirt on in 'Its Getting Hot In Here'
There are few people who can say they have managed a World Cup winning England team, but a few weeks ago in the 3rd Cadiz World Cup, arguably the toughest so far, playing indoors, to Futbol Sala rules, i became able to say that, and so, and one of the proudest moments of my life, The Award for Best Director goes to me Mathew Clarke for Managing Englands World Cup Winning team.

Rising Star Award:
  • BBQ Club in 'Lazy Days'
  • James Walsh in 'Vomatron'
  • Claire Bilton in 'Risky Business'
  • Clodagh Ryan in 'Chill Out Clo'
Although i probably risk castration for the outcome of this category, after much hard thinking, and head hurting, the final decision is made, and the award for the Rising Star in Cadiz award goes to James Walsh for his ability to slot straight into the group and go harder when needed, drink drink drink the Cadiz way! (Sorry Claire!

Best Music:
  • Stephan Meine
  • Alcon Moroney
  • Matthew Stevens
  • Dave Smith
DJ sets here there and everywhere, pre drinks, bar crawls, beach days, someone always has a playlist on the go, or can be seen fading tracks into each other, laptop on knee, drink in hand, but this category was always a two-horse race, and the bookies favourite came through strong. After a recent return to Cadiz, DJ Stephan Meine has stolen the award from the hands of Alcon.

Best Animation:
  • Matthew Stevens' classroom penis drawings in 'Welcome To The Free Life'
  • Mathew Clarke's Lecturer drawings in 'Welcome To The Free Life'
  • Maisie Kennedy, Natasha Pitt and Sarah Bailey's Posh Scale in 'Three Puta's, a Pad and Pen'
  • James Southam for his ability to create a Zoo on his mobile Phone Cover in 'Welcome To The Free Life'
  • Lucy Robinson for her Spanish Lit Love Hearts and Scribbles in, 'Welcome To The Free Life'
Drawings are not just drawings, each one of these magical sketches or designs are a way to pass time during dull lectures, pass by the rainy Cadiz days, and fill your life with a bit of childish fun, and although normally quality would prevail, and Lucy Robinson would win this category, her lack of imagination and flair has led the judges to a 3 horse race between James, Stevens and The Girls. Each one displaying a desire to ignore the task at hand and express their artistic side. Each one deserving recgnition, but only one can win, and after the recent death of half of James' phone zoo, and Matthew Stevens' recent Penis drawing drought, the award, for the longevity of the laughs and the imagination and inspiration of the project goes to Maisie, Natasha and Sarah for the Posh Scale.

Best Foreign Language:
  • Geoff
  • Stephan Meine
  • Lucas Uhold
  • Liz Zy
  • Papa Shmumph
Each of the above have successfully integrated themself not only into Cadiz life, but into an English group of friends which must be pretty daunting for any foreigner. However although they may all deserve the award, and recgnition for their efforts, only one can win. So the award for Best Foreign Language member of the Cadiz 2011 crew goes to..... Papa Schmumph, for his long term battle with starvation, murky waters, loud music, alcohol abuse, and Fausto as an owner.

Best Writing:
  • Cadiz: A Journey Too Far or The Beginning of More – Mathew Clarke
  • A Room With A Review – Matthew Stevens' 'special' film reviews
  • Motivation....less. Michael McPherson's Pre-World Cup(2) speech
  • Kellie Westerman's Jekyll and Hyde essay.
The Award, for best writing, after a year of inspiration stemming from the characters, scenery and eevents around in Cadiz, goes to this Blog, Mathew Clarke: Cadiz; A Journey Too Far? Or The Beginning Of More.... narrowly beating out Matty's 'special' reviews and Kellie's brave attempt at her Jekyll and Hyde essay.

Best Dance Direction:
  • Matthew Stevens' '3 Step' in 'Vomatron'
  • Lucas Uhold HelicopterMan in 'Fight Club'
  • Ashley Milns 'Tonight I'm Lovin You' in 'Floppy'
  • Michael McPherson Granada 10 topless dance in 'Granada Couture'
  • Mathew Clarke World Cup2 Macarena celebration in 'So Near Yet So Far'
Its never easy to decide the last category, a retired category in the Academy Awards of Hollywood now, but here in Cadiz, with the amounts of nights out, football celebrations, and all round mayhem that goes on here, we had to include this brilliant category. With the judging panel split, it was down to me to cast the final (and only) vote, so to finish ACEA 2011, The Award for Best Dance Direction, goes to, for his imagination in the moment, and ability to recall a drunken dance, Matthew Stevens for his '3 step' routine which is taking the breath away of people all around Cadiz nightclubs.

Special Mentions

Special Mentions go to the whole Cadiz Erasmus crew of 2011, my amazing housemates, our brilliant English crew both first and second semester, the Germans from San Antonio of first and second semester, the Italians, The Americans, The French, Polish, Dutch, Mexicans, Spanish, Belgians, Irish, North Africans, the people from all over the world i a, proud and honoured to be able to now call my friends, to the good times we have hard, and the difficult times we have all made it through and have come out smiling. You are all brilliant people and i thank you all.

Also a special mention goes out to all my mates back home in England and out on Erasmus placements around Europe and placements elsewhere who have read this blog religiously, i truly thank you, even if you have only read one every other month, it means alot to me that all you guy here in Cadiz and around the world give up time in your days to read what i have to say, I couldn't thank you all enough.

To all my family and all my friends, thankyou for your love, support and friendship throughout this year, you all mean the world to me.

A Final Fond Goodbye

What a brilliant year! The Best of my life, I'v one of the most perfect places in the world, A tonne of Perfect friends, all for life, and the Perfect girl, what more could i ask for? I have had a dream of a time here, yes there have been ups and downs just like in every situation, but we have gotten through them all, and come out the other side smiling and the best of friends. This has by far been the Time of my life, not only the Cadiz life, but writing for you guys, my loyal readers, i cannot stress how much it means to me that you give me the time in your days to read this. I hope you find the same time in your busy schedules next year to read it, and that i find the time to write to you all.

I am very sad at the prospect of leaving this place and these people, to leave behind La Caleta, Playa Santa Maria, Playa Victoria, McDonalds, Sagasta 36, San Antonio, The Bars, The Clubs, La Punta, Plaza Mina Ice Cream Shop, The Frozen Yoghurt shop down near Caleta, the wonderful Uni life here, and the gorgeous food we have had the luxury to eat over the past 9 months. But not all is lost, plans are in motion to return for Carnaval next year, and this summer, although i wont be in Cadiz, wont be so bad; time back at home with the family and Fudge, finally getting to see the Donny boys again and get back to good ol English football, and time spent, weekends and weeks with Claire, watching the Summer go by, before returning for a final year in Newcastle. Not so bad :)

So once again my fellow bloggers, my loyal readers, my family and my friends, i truly thank you, for you friendship, your time spent reading my babble, and for putting a smile on my face :) So here we go, with this Blog its one last pushg towards 5000 page views, what an honour :)

Its hard to say this but as the beautiful sun sets on Cadiz each night, the Sun has finally set on my time here, and my time writing this enjoyable blog for all you brilliant people out there, my family and friends i know read it, and the people i don't know, from Denmark, Israel, The USA, Russia, everywhere over Europe who have stumbled upon, or somehow found my blog, i thank you dearly, and would love if you could leave a message this time and maybe facebook me. So as the sun sets on our time together, there is only one last thing to say....

And so, sadly, for the last time, and with a slight tear in my eyes i say to you all, Goobye and....

Happy Blogging. :')

Remember, its simple to just click the boxes to let me know what you think, and if you have 2 seconds longer, just a line or two to say anything to me to make this last blog truly memorable.

Look out for the Summer 2011 blog, Blogged Reviews, and The Newcastle Blog all coming soon to your favourite webpage <3