Unnecessary Politics: The Rise And Fall Of A Dreamer

Three months ago the ever enthisiastic, smiley and happy Mathew Clarke sat down with the ever majestic Sean 'Pistol' Potter to be interviewed about Clarke's upcoming directorial debut with PROJECT X. Today you would be pushed to find similarities between Clarke of today and of three months before. Today we see a sullen face, a broken man, beaten down and ready to give in.

During the interview Clarke was thrilled to be asked about his love for Musical theatre and his excitement at the opportunity that had come his way, auditions were underway and everything was going swimmingly. You could be forgiven for assuming this was to be a great production, and that Clarke's enthusiasm would drive it home.

But things never go to plan do they, there are always bumps in the road, some bigger than others... some egos bigger than others. The cast grew, the cast shrunk, enthusiasm picked up and dropped off, but with a production, these things happen.

Clarke couldn't have asked to work with a better group of people, he ensured he had the best people around him to allow it to run smoothly and be a good show. He fixed it so the people with the right expertise looked over the right parts of the show, and was happy with the way the show was coming along. Numbers were dished out, ideas batted around, and the rehearsals set in motion.

If you could have heard some of the singers, soloist supremos, smashing numbers from hit musicals that have been performed on the most famous stages of the world, it was a great formula for a great show. So where did it all go wrong?

Like building a house, if the foundations arent there, the house will fall down, but if the foundations are there, but are bad, rotten foundations, then the house will collapse, the building will fall, and all the work that went into it, the design and dreams will dissapear, and die in a pile of rubble.

As well as building a house, building a structure, an organisation, even a family, needs the same solid foundations, sadly, those were overlooked, a genuine oversight in this case, a miscalculation, at first seemingly small, that festered and finally brought down the house.

The idea was big, the idea was ambitious, the idea was shot down. Idea becoming ideas week by week, the enthusiasm was sucked out by the fun police, the house began to wobble. The show became little more than a group of numbers thrown together in haste. The talent would still shine, but the backbone, the heart of the show had been ripped out and broken.

Bit by bit Clarke would be beaten down, belittled and feel downheartened as the pesimistic vultures started to circle. He still maintained hope, he still clung on in hope. The cast were still the same talented bunch, the same smiley faces, the same undoubtable effort, who were to receive the same lack of thanks.

But hey, work was done and they moved on, struggling in an uphill battle towards the show, as the weeks passed, and the show drew closer, the negative views started to grind the upbeat Clarke, then the shit hit the fan. A stupid, unproffessional mistake from Clarke saw the foundations begin to crumble, people began to talk, people began to bitch, and although people make mistakes, perhaps not all are forgiven.

Then something strange happened, a glimmer, a shining light of positivity, a mere 5 days till the show, and the majority of the group numbers were ready, the solos sounded good and attitudes were on the up, the words 'Im confident it will be a great show' were uttered, but uttered in hypocrisy, and the term familiarity breeds contempt springs to mind.

Like Julius Caeser Clarke was destined to fall, as the haters drew ever closer, and their plots were set in motion, the foundations began to crumble, and the house began to fall, now, like Caeser was, Clarke is left, alone, stabbed in the back from nowhere.

When did postivity leave the world, when did people become okay with belittling the dreams of others, and screwing over their friends? Come March, come 'Clarke's show' in which he will not be, you can understand if Clarke is nowhere to be seen, hoping for the fall of what could be described as the third reich. They call it a society, they claim it to be a democracy, their regime remains, their arses comfy on their much needed large thrones.

The Day Society Imploded

The scenes on the television, the noises in the street, fear fills most, but those few, those idiotic few, have found something else, a new found lust for destruction, for theft and anarchy. This is not 1981, this is 2011. Under a year until this proud country plays host to the top athletes and invites the world to join us for the greatest spectacle in the world... the 2012 Olympic Games.

Some may blame this on the death of one man from London. Mr Duggan, a father of four, was shot in Ferry Lane, Tottenham, north London, on Thursday, as officers attempted to make an arrest. There may be no evidence to suggest Mr. Duggan opened fire on the officers, but a gun was found on the scene. What was to come next could not have been predicted... Some of the worst scenes Britain has seen for many years.

Since Saturday England has been plagued by the complete devastation of buildings, looting of stock and the abuse of the police force. Starting in London that terrible night, we have seen shops burnt to the ground, once of course everything in there had been stolen, and groups of hundreds if not thousands of young people uprising against the people we put our faith in every day to protect us and our streets.

But where exactly were the police? It is clear to see that the situation was not handled as well as it could have and should have been. Many people have been interviewed and quoted as saying that they rang for the police, in desperate need of assistance, and, sadly, their calls were not answered. Youths left to their on devices, youths that without a doubt should not have been out at such times of the night as 3a.m when the riots were still going on.

So what or who is to blame? Were the police too trigger happy, were the police too slow to react to the uprising we are still seeing 4 days later? Are these just a collection of Britain's scum? Are we seeing an eventual reaction to the financial turmoil we see the world's economy in? Well if not the answer, I do know one thing... This may be the beginning of a sad and sorry end to society as we know it.

Wolverhampton, West Bromwich, Bristol, Birmingham, Manchester, and several areas of London sit in devastation and turmoil. Society is in a downward spiral and as the economy fails, and the government fail to act accordingly, there is one outlet, one service that has thrived, and sadly it has thrived in the worst way... Social networking has provided a way for the scum of Britain to get in touch and coordinate attacks and riots. On the 9^th of August 2011 perhaps the saddest and most disgraceful Facebook request was published... One sad, pathetic, horrific person organised for people to meet at 5pm at Salford Shopping Centre in Manchester to 'Steal Things'. A sad day for us all I think you'll agree.

What is this answer? How do we fight this issue? How can you stop this when there are people, men and women, aged everything between 7 and 47 ignoring every social norm, all respect for people around them and joining together to fight against the very people who are here to keep you safe? Plastic Bullets has been tipped as the best answer. But if this was America we wouldn't just see riot police trying to calm things down, the Army would be in, the real bullets would be out, and lives, however sad it may be, would be lost... But our police force are not allowed to do this. Bring out the water cannon? Not a chance says Theresa May.

The 6,000 brave men and women in the police force who were battling the crowds up until today, has now been raised to 16,000 police officers on the streets to try and nip this in the bud as soon as possible. To the Police Officers who are risking their lives to stop this nightmare, I commend you, you are brave, and brilliant, but you are too late. The government's decision to delay this move, to not decide upon this until the 4^th day, has let down those tax paying, honest citizens of Britain who have seen their homes destroyed and work places looted. Mr. Cameron you have let us down. Bring in what Army forces we haven't shipped out to fight yet, bring in the water cannons and plastic bullets, bring in an early curfew, bring in trucheons and tear gas, where is our Zero Tolerance to gang crime now?

111 of those brave officers who have put themselves in danger in the line of duty have been injured, people have been stabbed, shot, killed, and what is happening? Not a lot!

In this social networking world, our imperfect society has come undone. A faltering economy, a lack of opportunity for young people, and friction between the police and gangs around London have all been quoted as reasons for this nightmare, but I have some facts to add, some home truths that, thanks to this horrific time have been made aware;

• What are the parents of these youths doing? Children being allowed, some maybe encouraged to go out and join the madness, by parents who will probably sit on benefits, drinking their sorry lives away.
• The government has failed to react in a strong manner to combat the obvious uprising. The coalition has once more let us down in our times of need.
• The youth crime culture that has haunted our streets since the birth of the 'chav' has not been dealt with.

These sorry truths are now haunting us, and this, without a shadow of a doubt, needs to stop. These are not riots, this is not a reaction to the death of Mr. Duggan on Thursday. This is not Brixton Riots. This is the thuggish, yob, youth culture rising up, from their low IQ, Jeremy Kyle, Strong Cider, no qualification lives, and taking what is not theirs. People's livelihoods they have worked for. People's homes they have earned. People's history and future gone within days of sheer idiocy and anarchy.

A few right steps have been taken to stop this devastation; fast-track courts have been opened to see the criminals put to justice. Plastic Bullets are being given to the brave police who's numbers are gladly being increased to stem this mayhem.

This has been a sad time for our society. We no longer stand as a proud country, but a country ashamed of the people we see around us acting in such a shameful way.

Thanks to Twitter, Facebook and BlackBerry Messenger, this has surely become the biggest organised crime case in history.

My fellow educated people, let us all come together, as the scum has, but instead of destroying people's lives, let us join together to correct all the wrongs of these sad people.

And The Award Goes To......

Afternoon Bloggers,
So after 9 months in the sun, i only have 5 days remaining in the place that i have come to call home... Cadiz. Like at the end of all great seasons, football, film, music, music and television, there comes the awards. And with the end of the Cadiz blog very close, this is no different.

So by selecting the most appropriate of awards from the BAFTAS and Oscar's, it is my proud priveledge to announce the nominations and results for the Academy of Cadiz Erasmus Awards 2011 (ACEA)

But first thing i have to mention the amazing 3 weeks i have had since we last spoke, things have really taken off here in Cadiz, a moment too late, blink, and its now over! First visitor was Craig 'The Lad' Morrison, a week in the sort of sun with him, drinking and partying hard, loving life with an old freind, reminscing of times gone by. Then came Charlotte, one of my best friends in the world, and who i had an amazing weekend with, also with one of her close friends Scouse Jade. Then arrived Claire, here for a week, one of the best weeks ever, hand down, and our first real amaount of time together, amazing! Then she was gone and for a day i was alone, no visitors here to rid the sadness from my bones, but just around the corner was a big ball of banter.... James Walsh, the Youtube Legend and loyal reader ond feature of this Blog, and this week with him, (now longer as he has cooly extended his stay to go home with me!!!!) has been truly sensational.

On top of the visitors, the business has been going swimmingly, Erasmus payed us a nice amount for our Uni lifestyle here, exams have gone well and the sun has been blazing down beautifully!

Best Male in a Leading Role:

• Michael McPherson in the rollercoaster RomCom 'The Dark Kike'
• Max Sturridge in the hilarious Inbetweeners-esque 'Why Won't It Work?'
• Ashley Milns in the reoccuring nightmare of 'Floppy'
• Matthew Stevens in the Glittery madness of 'Carnaval'

And the Award, after much deliberation, goes to Ashley Milns for his dedication to the cause, narrowly beating out Matty's drinking dedication to the Prize

Best Female in a Leading Role:

• Katie Bilton in the knackering 'The Italian Job'
• Maisie Kennedy in the risque Cadiz slot of 'The L Word'
• Kellie Westerman in The Painfully awkward 'Slam: A Tale of Two Doors'
• Laura Payne in The mystery departure RomCom 'For a Boy!'

And the Award, for Best Female in a Leading Role, for Cadiz 2011, goes to, for her consistency over the long time spent filming and her commitment to the cause, Katie Bilton, narrowly beating out Kellie Westerman in her hilarious role in Slam.

Best Male in a Supporting Role:

• Lucas Uhold in the exciting 'Fight Club'
• Dave Smith in 'For a Boy!'
• Alex Coyne in the seaside college comedy 'Fraturday'
• Mathew Clarke in the drag queen thriller 'Halloween'

And the award, for Best Male in a Supporting Role, goes to, and this was a difficult one, they all performed so well, but in the end, due to comedy value, the award goes to Dave Smith for his persistent annoyance of Laura Payne in For A Boy.

Best Female in a Supporting Role:

• Kellie Westerman in 'The Dark Kike'
• Bee Heal improving her Spanish in 'International Relations'
• Kate Newman for her portrayal of Max's supportive friend in 'Why Won't it Work?'
• Lucy Robinson in the Crime Drama 'The BBQ Thief'

And the award, after changing my mind 4 times, each person having recieved it at least once in my mind, goes to, for her delicate, under-the-radar portrayal of a predator, Bee Heal.

Best Newcomer:

• Craig Morrison in the Hangover-esque 'The American'
• James Walsh in the alcohol fueled 'Vomatron'
• Mael M'Baye making a brilliant cameo in 'Carnaval'
• Abi Housden in the chilled sofa comedy 'Connect Four'.

And the winner, coming out of nowhere to grab not only the girl, but the award here is Craig Morrison.

Makeup and Hair Design:

• Matthew Stevens for his Yellow, Gold and Silver outings in 'Carnaval'
• Matthew Stevens in his sexy Nurse costume and Red Hair in 'Halloween'
• Mathew Clarke in Blonde and PVC as a slutty Nurse in 'Halloween'
• Sam Maloney giving his best 'Suited Up' attempt in 'Granada Couture'

After much discussion between myself and me, erm, the award, although i somehow came last in this category, goes to Mathew Stevens for his role in Halloween, a ghastly mess which looked somehow scarily perfect.

Best Moment in Drama:

• Kellie Westerman slams the door in Mike's face in 'Slam...' the painful prequel to 'The Dark Kike'
• Katie Bilton hobbling to the Hospital during 'Carnaval' madness
• Katie Bilton susses Me and Claire out in Umec in the edge of your seat romance 'Risky Business'
• Lucas Uhold drops broken legged Fausto mid HelicopterMan in 'Fight Club'

And the award, in a tough category in which any of the 3 people from the four moments could have snatched the award...... goes to...... Katie Bilton for her brilliant sisterly nouse which helped her to suss out mine and Claire's relationship, 3 days after it began!

Best Moment in Comedy:

• Lucas Uhold running around in 'Carnaval' dressed as a gay bee
• Mike McPherson getting kicked out of Granada 10 topless in 'Granada Couture'
• Laura Payne picking her sick out of her sink and throwing it our of her window in 'For a Boy'
• Ash Milns pissing himself in the street outside our hostel in the opening scenes of 'Slam...'
• James Southam for his inability to stand up in Magdala in '1 Tequila, 2 Tequila....'

Like all great comedy moments these four had the magic formula, great participants, the shock value, perfect timing, and the hilarity factor. One of the hardest decisions so far, but after taking time out to let my mind wander back to these great moments, the award goes to..... Laura Payne for her shockingly gross puking incident.

Best Original Storyline:

• Mike McPherson and Kellie Westerman's Kike romance in 'The Dark Kike'
• 'Carnaval' opening weekend madness
• Granada weekend in 'Granada Couture'
• Portugal Road Trip in 'Four go Car-Boating' 

All four of these were perhaps the most brilliant, random and enjoyable of times here in Cadiz, out of nowhere these occured, from Mike and Kellie's love, Carnaval's manic opening weekend, The brilliant weekend celebrating Tash and Mike's birthdays in Granada or the Road Trip in which Myself, Tash, Katie and Ash almost sank in floods on our way to having an amazing time travelling to and from Portugal in one day. However a winner must be chosen, and by the hair on my nose, the award goes to Granada Couture for giving us a great weekend in Granada, partying, hanging and seeing the beautiful sights.

Best Adapted Storyline:

• 'Halloween' costume madness
• Sam Maloney's inability to pay the right amount at a restaurant in 'Special Sam'
• 'Carnaval' closing weekend madness
• Erasmus new arrivals in 'Welcome to the Free Life'

Each of these great storylines could have knicked it, each one a shadow of another great time before, but in the end, because of consistency, annoyance, comic value and how it sticks in your memories, the award goes to Sam Maloney for his, A in Maths ALevel or not, inability to add up his items on a bill and pay the correct amount for his meals.

Best Director:

• Mathew Clarke for Directing England's World Cup Futbol Sala win in '3 Lion Glory'
• Matthew Stevens for Directing Cadiz's Erasmus Futbol Sala win in 'Malaga Mayhem'
• Lucas Uhold's HelicopterMan in 'Fight Club'
• Katie Bilton's directional struggle to keep Matty Stevens' shirt on in 'Its Getting Hot In Here'

There are few people who can say they have managed a World Cup winning England team, but a few weeks ago in the 3rd Cadiz World Cup, arguably the toughest so far, playing indoors, to Futbol Sala rules, i became able to say that, and so, and one of the proudest moments of my life, The Award for Best Director goes to me Mathew Clarke for Managing Englands World Cup Winning team.

Rising Star Award:

• BBQ Club in 'Lazy Days'
• James Walsh in 'Vomatron'
• Claire Bilton in 'Risky Business'
• Clodagh Ryan in 'Chill Out Clo'

Although i probably risk castration for the outcome of this category, after much hard thinking, and head hurting, the final decision is made, and the award for the Rising Star in Cadiz award goes to James Walsh for his ability to slot straight into the group and go harder when needed, drink drink drink the Cadiz way! (Sorry Claire!

Best Music:

• Stephan Meine
• Alcon Moroney
• Matthew Stevens
• Dave Smith

DJ sets here there and everywhere, pre drinks, bar crawls, beach days, someone always has a playlist on the go, or can be seen fading tracks into each other, laptop on knee, drink in hand, but this category was always a two-horse race, and the bookies favourite came through strong. After a recent return to Cadiz, DJ Stephan Meine has stolen the award from the hands of Alcon.

Best Animation:

• Matthew Stevens' classroom penis drawings in 'Welcome To The Free Life'
• Mathew Clarke's Lecturer drawings in 'Welcome To The Free Life'
• Maisie Kennedy, Natasha Pitt and Sarah Bailey's Posh Scale in 'Three Puta's, a Pad and Pen'
• James Southam for his ability to create a Zoo on his mobile Phone Cover in 'Welcome To The Free Life'
• Lucy Robinson for her Spanish Lit Love Hearts and Scribbles in, 'Welcome To The Free Life'

Drawings are not just drawings, each one of these magical sketches or designs are a way to pass time during dull lectures, pass by the rainy Cadiz days, and fill your life with a bit of childish fun, and although normally quality would prevail, and Lucy Robinson would win this category, her lack of imagination and flair has led the judges to a 3 horse race between James, Stevens and The Girls. Each one displaying a desire to ignore the task at hand and express their artistic side. Each one deserving recgnition, but only one can win, and after the recent death of half of James' phone zoo, and Matthew Stevens' recent Penis drawing drought, the award, for the longevity of the laughs and the imagination and inspiration of the project goes to Maisie, Natasha and Sarah for the Posh Scale.

Best Foreign Language:

• Geoff
• Stephan Meine
• Lucas Uhold
• Liz Zy
• Papa Shmumph

Each of the above have successfully integrated themself not only into Cadiz life, but into an English group of friends which must be pretty daunting for any foreigner. However although they may all deserve the award, and recgnition for their efforts, only one can win. So the award for Best Foreign Language member of the Cadiz 2011 crew goes to..... Papa Schmumph, for his long term battle with starvation, murky waters, loud music, alcohol abuse, and Fausto as an owner.

Best Writing:

• Cadiz: A Journey Too Far or The Beginning of More – Mathew Clarke
• A Room With A Review – Matthew Stevens' 'special' film reviews
• Motivation....less. Michael McPherson's Pre-World Cup(2) speech
• Kellie Westerman's Jekyll and Hyde essay.

The Award, for best writing, after a year of inspiration stemming from the characters, scenery and eevents around in Cadiz, goes to this Blog, Mathew Clarke: Cadiz; A Journey Too Far? Or The Beginning Of More.... narrowly beating out Matty's 'special' reviews and Kellie's brave attempt at her Jekyll and Hyde essay.

Best Dance Direction:

• Matthew Stevens' '3 Step' in 'Vomatron'
• Lucas Uhold HelicopterMan in 'Fight Club'
• Ashley Milns 'Tonight I'm Lovin You' in 'Floppy'
• Michael McPherson Granada 10 topless dance in 'Granada Couture'
• Mathew Clarke World Cup2 Macarena celebration in 'So Near Yet So Far'

Its never easy to decide the last category, a retired category in the Academy Awards of Hollywood now, but here in Cadiz, with the amounts of nights out, football celebrations, and all round mayhem that goes on here, we had to include this brilliant category. With the judging panel split, it was down to me to cast the final (and only) vote, so to finish ACEA 2011, The Award for Best Dance Direction, goes to, for his imagination in the moment, and ability to recall a drunken dance, Matthew Stevens for his '3 step' routine which is taking the breath away of people all around Cadiz nightclubs.

Special Mentions

Special Mentions go to the whole Cadiz Erasmus crew of 2011, my amazing housemates, our brilliant English crew both first and second semester, the Germans from San Antonio of first and second semester, the Italians, The Americans, The French, Polish, Dutch, Mexicans, Spanish, Belgians, Irish, North Africans, the people from all over the world i a, proud and honoured to be able to now call my friends, to the good times we have hard, and the difficult times we have all made it through and have come out smiling. You are all brilliant people and i thank you all.

Also a special mention goes out to all my mates back home in England and out on Erasmus placements around Europe and placements elsewhere who have read this blog religiously, i truly thank you, even if you have only read one every other month, it means alot to me that all you guy here in Cadiz and around the world give up time in your days to read what i have to say, I couldn't thank you all enough.

To all my family and all my friends, thankyou for your love, support and friendship throughout this year, you all mean the world to me.

A Final Fond Goodbye

What a brilliant year! The Best of my life, I'v one of the most perfect places in the world, A tonne of Perfect friends, all for life, and the Perfect girl, what more could i ask for? I have had a dream of a time here, yes there have been ups and downs just like in every situation, but we have gotten through them all, and come out the other side smiling and the best of friends. This has by far been the Time of my life, not only the Cadiz life, but writing for you guys, my loyal readers, i cannot stress how much it means to me that you give me the time in your days to read this. I hope you find the same time in your busy schedules next year to read it, and that i find the time to write to you all.

I am very sad at the prospect of leaving this place and these people, to leave behind La Caleta, Playa Santa Maria, Playa Victoria, McDonalds, Sagasta 36, San Antonio, The Bars, The Clubs, La Punta, Plaza Mina Ice Cream Shop, The Frozen Yoghurt shop down near Caleta, the wonderful Uni life here, and the gorgeous food we have had the luxury to eat over the past 9 months. But not all is lost, plans are in motion to return for Carnaval next year, and this summer, although i wont be in Cadiz, wont be so bad; time back at home with the family and Fudge, finally getting to see the Donny boys again and get back to good ol English football, and time spent, weekends and weeks with Claire, watching the Summer go by, before returning for a final year in Newcastle. Not so bad :)

So once again my fellow bloggers, my loyal readers, my family and my friends, i truly thank you, for you friendship, your time spent reading my babble, and for putting a smile on my face :) So here we go, with this Blog its one last pushg towards 5000 page views, what an honour :)

Its hard to say this but as the beautiful sun sets on Cadiz each night, the Sun has finally set on my time here, and my time writing this enjoyable blog for all you brilliant people out there, my family and friends i know read it, and the people i don't know, from Denmark, Israel, The USA, Russia, everywhere over Europe who have stumbled upon, or somehow found my blog, i thank you dearly, and would love if you could leave a message this time and maybe facebook me. So as the sun sets on our time together, there is only one last thing to say....

And so, sadly, for the last time, and with a slight tear in my eyes i say to you all, Goobye and....

Happy Blogging. :')

Remember, its simple to just click the boxes to let me know what you think, and if you have 2 seconds longer, just a line or two to say anything to me to make this last blog truly memorable.

Look out for the Summer 2011 blog, Blogged Reviews, and The Newcastle Blog all coming soon to your favourite webpage <3

Our Very Own Disney Musical :)

Afternoon Bloggers.

I rarely apologise for anything on my blog, or for much in general! I am what I am, I write what I write. The aim of the previous two blogs was, like the others, entertain, and inform, however many don't seem to have appreciated them, for this I apologise. I may have gone on about a certain someone a tad too much, but hey, I write what comes to me, and she is stuck on my mind.

For the first time in too long I am churning out a second, fantastic blog in around a week, and this one is certainly back to what you guys love; funny, loving and above all involves a hell of a lot of people!! Boredom has both it's upsides and downsides, the major downside being I have been flipping bored for the last few hours, the upside, I decided to channel it into creating something beautiful, touching and hilarious :) let's see if you enjoy it as much as I have....

So welcome, one and all. Get yourself comfy, grab a cuppa, or maybe, just maybe this time, grab yourself a) some popcorn, b) a comfier chair , and c) a box of tissues be it happy or sad, and allow me, your ever loyal blogger, to take you on a journey through my mind.... No not the mind of a child... But instead through the past few years, and the Disney Musical I have been living.

The last 3 years of my life have been by far the best, I have lived the uni lifestyle, making the most out of the opportunities thrown my way; I have taken part in Rag Week, Performed in Fame the Musical and hopefully played a big role in the Society, helped Becky Warburton get re-elected into her Sabbatical position, done well in my exams, drank Newcastle out of Skittles and VK's, and now I am thoroughly enjoying every moment of my time in Cádiz, living a Spanish life, beach, booze, fun, frolics and fiestas!

I have met so many amazing people it would have been difficult to include you all but iv given it my very best shot, sorry if I have left you out,I don't think any less of you... Well..... ;)

First things first with my animated Disney extravaganza, bringing the characters together from all those sensational movies out there, and giving them roles as my friends....

After which will come the musicals all important soundtrack, playing to all the key incidents throughout my last 3 years!

Myself - I do feel, not just this year, but through the last 3 years at uni, I have grown up substantially. I am still a kid on the inside, but I mostly know where to draw the line. This year especially has been a big step up for me, and I only think il further myself in the future. To represent me, I have chosen because of these facts, the fun, childish, but king-to-be Simba from the Lion King.

Claire Bilton - the Narla to my Simba, Claire is beautiful, adventurous, kind and considerate just like Narla, but also has the same boisterous, bossy, mean streak Narla's character has too. Bringing out the best in me just as Narla does to Simba, she is the luckiest lioness in the world :D

Ashley Milns - My friends, we have covered this ground before. The Ash we all know, with the farty arse, the thirst for being the best, the lack of common sense, and particular body odour.... Is the one we know as Pumba also from the Lion King.

Geoffrey - Geoff is our young buck. The French weird food connoisseur, with the sober smooth nature, and drunken arrogance of his proud nation. With a quick tongue, smart mind, but sometimes naive nature, he is the perfect fit for the character of Lumiere from The Beauty and the Beast.

Kelpie Westerman - Also covered ground, Kellie's nature is one of seeing the most, and the best of the world around her. Sometimes a little too naive, Kellie normally has the right balance between her thirst for adventure, and her need for companionship. Belle represents both her intelligence and kind nature.

Michael McPherson - Unfortunately for Mike, this means only one thing.... He's stuck with the Beast. This however, is not due to looks, (although his new attempt at a beard is seemingly sending him in that direction), but in fact because at the start, he was unknown to us, a new, maybe intimidating prospect. Now, now he is just himself, a good guy (maybe needing to see a few wrongs righted.... Like the washing up!!!!) and has fallen for the girl he was snacked up with.

Sam Maloney - When he was in Cai Sam was the one who, mistakenly, often thought he was right. A hilarious guy that could be on either end of a joke. Our little meercat with the raptor hands could only be portrayed as the loveable, dim, very funny Timone from the Lion King.

Sarah Bailey - This sophisticated blonde is perhaps more of a thrill seeker than her appearance and accent would tell you. Enjoying a night out with the lads perhaps not what she was 'brought up to' like, but hey, she likes an adventure as much as the next person. Throughout her little adventures, she rightly looks to keep her feet on the ground and keeps perspective of things around her.... Perfect for Alice from Alice in Wonderland.

Katie Bilton - Up until she had been here a few months Katie was a taken woman. A boyfriend back in Blighty she was reserved and motherly. Sadly that went pear shaped, and she was 'released from her box', her hair let down, the Katie we now know and love was set free. Intelligent, Fun, strong willed but up for a laugh any time, always longing for company but maintaining her independence throughout, Katie is the embodiment of Jessie from the 2nd and 3rd Toy Story films.

Natasha Pitt - Last time I did this for Tash, she may not have been best pleased by the outcome. This time round I hope for more. Although always among friends, always having a laugh, Tash has a motherly nature and will always keep you in touch. Because of this I thought Mrs. Potato Head from the Toy Story films was much more fitting this time round than Balloo the bear.

Kate Newman - Although seemingly rather intelligent, Kate keeps this on the down-low, her bubbly, forgetful, hilarious nature covering any smidgen of intelligence. Her funny, loving, but often dim nature makes it impossible to not give the role to Dory from Finding Nemo.

Bee Heal - Little Miss Priss. Bee was brought up seemingly by the Queen ;) a silver spoon may be sometimes seen protruding from her mouth, but only when she is aboard the yacht of course! Loveable, kind, caring and considerate, Bee can have as much of a good time as anybody else, but maintains her air throughout. So sorry for the sex change Bee but it was too difficult to not give you Cogsworth from Beauty and the Beast.

Max Sturridge - Max was our very own free spirit. Did what he liked, or who he liked;)and made the very most out of his semester here in Cádiz. Only brought down to Earth by the affection of a woman, Max is a perfect representation of the Tarzan character in the film by the same name.

Maisie Kennady - Maisie is our cockney rebel. Under the watchful eye and brilliant care of Cogsworth she is a friend to all.... Especially the carrefour alcohol aisle! She too is a free spirit, but has the rebellious streak against social norms and inequalities max did not. For this reason I have chosen to cast Nemo in the role (sorry for the sex change too Maisie!!)

Alex Coyne - The White guy with the Blackman's swag. Boastful and boozey, Coyney is hilariously entertaining. Sometimes straying a little too big for his boots, he can be easily mis-understood and cause offence. On the inside, and the majority of the time the outside too, Coyney is top guy, a great PAL and key to any great night out. For the fact he likes to be on top, sometimes show off, but in the end is a top guy, Alex is my Buzz Lightyear from Toy Story.

Joe Walby and Reuben Litman - the two are together here as they are in Cádiz life. Rarely are the two seen apart. They are brilliant guys, up for a laugh and a great night whenever you want, and never ones to turn down shots on offer. Reubs and Joe are the Scooby and Scrappy Doo of our Disney extravaganza, for me this only means one double act.... Crush and Squirt from Finding Nemo. Just like the turtles, these two are laid back and chilled to the maaaaaaxxxxx, and perfectly portray the characteristics of the two coolest Turtles in the ocean.

Dave Smith - Our loveable, hilarious, cockney tool has quickly established himself as a major part of Cai life. Always one of the first people up for a night out, and always one of the last ones to get in at the end. He has a wicked sense of humour, but mixed perfectly with his wonderfully kind personality.... Weird for a Londoner ey?! Our Dave is the perfect candidate for the Toy Story unsung hero, Mr. Potato Head.

Clodagh Ryan - Normally my very rational fear of wronging the Irish in fear of leprechauns murdering me in my sleep, means that Clo escapes my witty Tongue.... Crash.... end of that madness! Clo is, well, special :) her intelligence may often cloud her social rational and a thirst for things to be just right, the same.... So maybe she is a tad anal. I did think of making her Zazu from the Lion King, but then I remembered, her heart is very much in the right place, and she has seen a lot of the world, and experienced a lot, so instead I chose Jane from Tarzan, the intelligent, worldly heroine who has her feet firmly on the ground.

Laura Payne - The little lass from the midlands, previously described as pretty and witty, much like her character, Tinkerbell from Peter Pan. Pretty but Vein, witty but sometimes quite wrong, the most important thing? Her heart is firmly in the right place!

Lucy Robinson - Our exotic beauty with a lazy ass but desire to do good when she gets the bug. Wise and wonderful, opinionated and moody, she has two sides to her, depending on how tired she is!! So I did ponder Mulan for her character, but recent developments have led me to see her as more of a Jasmine from Aladdin, but will she hop on the magic carpet and go along for the ride?

Matty Stevens - How easy would it be just to say that Mad Hatter Matty was indeed the Mad Hatter...? Too easy! Mat is our mad man, high on life and low on inhibitions. With a wise nature, and a friendly tone, his voice is unmistakeable and everyone knows who he is..... Who is he? Rafiki of course from The Lion King!!

Sophie Attari - Mathew's Missus was plunged from her world into ours and quickly became a loved part of the Cádiz crew. Although not a red head, her desire to be part of our world and be with her man makes it a simple casting... Ariel from The Little Mermaid.

James Southam - The loveable, quiet character is James, our Manchester Utd scummy fan who may me mis understood as too reserved. A true laugh when he is out and about, as long as the scum aren't the topic of choice. The Genie from Aladdin perfectly tells you of James, quiet and quite reserved, but rub his lamp and baaaaammmmm, he's a hoot and a half!

Tom Bates - the londoner with the diet of beer! A colourful personality to say the least, easily angered, but often freaking hilarious. Likes things his way, but as an Arsenal fan rarely gets them! Often sending him into a sulk just like his character Donald Duck.

Erin Hunter - Tom's crazy Yank girlfriend, bubbly, funny, gleeky and mad! Get a drink down her and she is unstoppable! She is caring and cultured whilst maintaining her wild side. Perfectly matching Tom's Donald as the alluring Daisy Duck.

Alcon Moroney - DJ Alcon in the hizzeyyyy, in the day he is a regular everyday teacher, but cometh the hour cometh the man, when the sun goes down out comes super Alcon, the drunken DJ from the land of the Leprechauns! Although intelligent and witty, he often let's that sit on the back burner and his chilled nature comes to the forefront, much like good ol Goofy.

James Walsh - What does James love to do? Well apart from minging women, he loves nothing more than lazing in bed and eating the day away! A superb friend to all, the big guy has a heart of gold.... Of golden honey! Winnie the Pooh perfectly captures the character of one of my Best friends in the world.

Pieter Lishman - The guy who lovessssss to be the centre of attention! He's got swagger and he knows it. People love him even if he can be a big headed git! And I am thoroughly looking forward to living with our very own Mickey Mouse next year! (You were so close to being given Gaston from Beauty and the Beast Lishman!!)

Tom Melody - The lazy Sheffield sod! If you are lucky enough to roll him off of his arse and out of bed you are usually in for a good time! He makes the time he can be arsed to do anything count! Somehow the lucky bugger, be he lazy or not, always seems to come out on the right end of things, just like Eeyore, the pessimistic lazy ass!

Sean Potter - likes to have the rule of the roost, and loves nothing more than being right! If he had it his own way he would be right always, and always in charge, however, when it comes to the big things, he often has to swallow his words and take a back seat.... This however does not mean he's a plonker... Far from, my housemate next year is a top guy. Who can have a good time when needed, and works his ass off the rest of the time. Our very own Woody from Toy Story.

Chris Richards - My brother from another mother, one of the best friends a guy could ask for, but he sure needs some looking after when he's rat-arsed!! Perhaps a kid at heart, the boyo works hard during the day and then makes up for it in booze when the chance comes up! He is the Mowgli of our group at home, being looked after of course by our very own Balloo, one James Mellor! The big git is a softy on the inside without a doubt! One of the terrible foursome who maintain the Donny atmosphere when the rest of our group are away at uni. Helping him along with Chris is Joe Marriott, the Bagheera of the three, more reserved and studious, whilst, when given the opportunity, ready to drink the night away!

Simon Rogers - annoying, childish, loud, arrogant, always wrong.... But amazing beyond belief. A boyo down to the core. A great friend and vital to any nights out we go on in Donny! He may never grow up much like his character Peter Pan, but we don't need him too, because it's hilarious going along for the ride!

Mathew Evans - a joy to be with, a brilliant guy with his very own twist on reality! Style passed him by in the 90s LOL but we love him nonetheless! His loud mouth though we often do not appreciate!! When drunk his mouthy nature gets him in as much trouble ad it does his character.... Iago from Aladdin!

Luke Mcmahon - the full of energy, but full of small man syndrome dude. Always longing for something to do, be it footy, or boozing, he is always a laugh and, having known him since nursery, a true friend to all. He is very much our Tigger from Winnie the Pooh!

Matthew 'Dobbi' Hopson - the biggest git I know in Donny! Not one you would ever mess with on a night out, towering at heights of around 6 foot 5 Dobbi is an imposing sod! However, those of you who know him, and know him well, know this to be false, he may be tall and scary looking, but our own Sulley from Monsters Inc is a big softy, who wouldn't hurt a fly.... Unless you pee him off!

Charlotte Caley - Now my second best female friend in the world (sorry dude gotta praise my lady hahaha!!), Charlotte is an insistent fool, constantly searching for the best in people, be they ding-bats or not! She has a longing to see the most of the people around her, and rightly make the most of the opportunities she is given. Seemingly drawn to damaged goods, Charlotte is caring, loving and hilariously lacking of common sense! She is the story's Esmerelda from the Hunchback of Nottre Damme.

The soundtrack and key events

- Opening Credits - Go The Distance (Hercules)

- The three years kick off with me going off to university, or Breaking Free (High School Musical) of home and starting a new life of independence.

- First and Second year flew by, and living with the likes of James, Sean, Lishman, Tom etc was a blast, we had all we needed in life.... The Bear Necessities (Jungle Book)!!

- Holidays were always thoroughly looked forward to, be it summer, Easter or Christmas back in Doncaster with the family, the lads and other great friends such as Oliver, Charlotte, Greg etc... They were some of the best times, and I will never forget the times that were so, how can you put it?.... Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious (Mary Poppins).

- Coming to Cádiz was a massive step in my life, and my growing up. It was one I wasn't 100% sure of and one I was quite worried about. To think I was leaving England and stepping into A Whole New World (Aladdin)

- Meeting all my new friends here, all the Erasmus, locals, teachers and students was a daunting thing. You had to make a good impression, these were your friends for the next year, in a foreign country!!! Luckily they too were Strangers Like Me (Tarzan).

- The birth of Kike was a big event in our year. It saw the loss of two bodies, and the formation of one entity! It was definitely the Start of Something New (High School Musical).

- Heading to Granada was the major expedition we went on as a group first semester, meeting new friends, re-aquatinting with old ones, we had an absolute blast with everyone, all friends together, enjoying life..... You've got a friend in me (Toy Story)

- Christmas 2010 in England was possibly the best and most meaningful ever. Haing been away from the family for many months it meant all that more to be back with them and back among all my friends in Newcastle and Doncaster having a scream of a time! You know what means no worries?.... Hakuna Matata (Lion King)

- Sadly in January we had to say goodbye to some very good friends, each one amazing and special to us in their own way, each one dearly missed. A Friend Like Me (Aladdin)

- But the roundabout of life took another turn, and we welcomed a new batch of students, and with them, a huge new batch of friends, great friends, but hey that truly is the Circle of Life (Lion King)

- Then along came Claire, Katies sister, beautiful and fantastic, and all I wanted was to listen to Sebastian and Kiss The Girl (Little Mermaid)

- A short but amazing trip to Essex came along then to see the now my girlfriend Claire. A brilliant trip back to England, that was everything and more than I could have hoped for.... Right Here, Right Now (High School Musical 3)

- For not just me, but everyone like Clodagh, Matty, Lucy, James Southam, Maisie and many more, not just girlfriend and boyfriends but best friends and family, we miss people so much at times and just, truly want to be Part of Your World (Little Mermaid)

- Now sadly our time in Cai is drawing to an end, it has been amazing but now only 6 weeks remain, much less for other people. We have had the time of our lives and Cádiz I speak for everyone when I say... You Will Always Be In My Heart (Tarzan)

- Closing Credits - Can You Feel The Love Tonight (Lion King)

This was just a lot of fun to write, I do apologise if I have missed anyone out, as you can see ii covered a lotttttttttt and now my hands hurt from typing on the saint Ashley Milns' ipad2!!!

Other than the fun I had with this, the idea was to show you that n matter where you are in the world, whoever you are with, don't forget those you care about back home, or when you're at home, this who matter elsewhere. Friends are for life, they mean the world too you, even if you may not show it. My life is a laugh, I have a great life, a great girl, and some of the best friends anyone could ask for (If I had Alan Shearer, Robert De Niro, Martin Scorcese and Vanessa Hudgens too it would be the best not some of the best.... Sorry!!!) and I am very lucky for this. So why not tell that special someone, or even those special people how much you appreciate them, you've only got so long!

Happy Blogging :)

If you've made it this far I thank you ever so much :) it has been a pleasure writing for you these last 8 months! But please, comment, share with friends, hell if you're lazy, just check a box below :) and remember.... A smile is infectious, spread it about :)

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Cleaning The Plate...

Afternoon Bloggers,

Another brilliant two weeks on along the Cádiz journey guys :) Last time we left each other on a rather soppy, rather brilliant point. And since then ALMOST everything has gone swimmingly....

Themes often run throughout the blogs, films, music, books, tales of romance, tales of torture, comedy and endless gaffs. However, very few hae featured one of the things i love the most in this world, the thing that i hold so close to my heart, and one of the things that on a down day, on days where id wish to be anywhere but here, makes me feel better.... FOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!

It has been a great two weeks in all senses of the word, great weather, great times, and great, great food! It has been a culinary whirlwind, In just under two weeks i have managed to devour (in every sense of the fatty word), around 8 different cuisines, some better than others, but all, sending my taste buds on a different ride:

As every other week eating Spanish, American, Italian and Mexican came as normal; Ribs and Steaks being our meat fuel whilst playing Max Payne and Splinter Cell with Matty, beautiful Tapas with Spud, Katie and Matty, watching the Barca first leg with a lovely Mexican with Ash, Mike and Kellie and of course the same old crappy oven pizzas to fill the gaps!!

But nothing could compare to the food i woud have on a little trip back to England, a fantastic trip, with fantastic grub. But It wasn't just all about the food, it was a trip back to see the missus, see her family, see mine and enjoy my time back in England, for the last time before the Summer.

Arriving at Stanstead Airport late Friday night, the Pilot telling us there was a 'Warm Summery Breeze', was awful, tired and cold, i was sooo happy to see the smiling faces of Claire and her Parents, and get into the warmth of their house, a short car ride after being re-united with the Bilton Clan!

After a luuuush tea of Jacket potato, beans and cheese, a film and bed was enough for a very tired me after a long day! An earlyish night perfect before another long day on Saturday...

Saturday would see myself and the missus train it to London, (getting off at Westfields, although the totally wrong Westfields!!!) to have a lovely day in the Capital and introduce Claire to my Uncle and Daniel. After a wondeful afternoon in the Camden Town sun, browsing the stalls and sampling more cuisine from around the world; Turkish Kebab for myself and a lush Chicken Fajita for Claire who instead of eating it, thouht spilling it down her white top was a better option! We spent the early afternoon strolling around the shops, brushng past THE Pixie Lott, (looking not all that sensational if i may say so!!!), and then braving the hustle and bustle of the weekend tube.

After having arriving back at my Uncle's apartment for a short rest and chat, we headed to the correct Westfields in Shepherd's Bush. The look in Claire's eyes when we walked in through the 'Village' entrance making my wallet shiver in fear as he stare was drawn towards the well dressed windows of Gucci, Mulberry, Burberry, Prada, Tiffany's and Dolce and Gabbana among others. But a brief browse among the shelves of Topshop, New Look, Boots and H'n'M was all there was time for before we headed back to Holland Park to get changed into our posh stuff as we were heading to the celebrity hot spot Nobu for Japenese.

A feast for the eyes, the missus looking top dollar in her dress and wedges, and a true feast for the stomach. Dishes that not only had i never tried, but that had never come across either my mind or my eyes, culinary masterpieces that tittilated the taste buds. Lobster Salad, Tempura Vegestables, Soft Shell Crab Sushi Rolls, Raw Tuna and Salmon, Seafood Paella, and of course the Legendary Black Cod!!!!! Delicious, Delectable, Dreamy, all are too little to describe the amazing meal we had. But the show was only just starting, the mains, the beautifully presented drinks, both just appearing as a cameo to, what could only be desrcibed as, the 'World Cup Final' of the meal.... Although i love lots of foods, savory or sweet, foreign or domestic, hot or cold, there is little that can fill me, make me feel as good, and as happy as a great desert. And when Daniel's 'Chocolate Tart' came, we didn't expect the spectacle that was about to occur... what appeared to just be a Chocolate ball on a bed of oatmeal, turned, much like the Ugly Duckling, into an art, a masterpiece, the Eiffel Tower of Deserts, witht he addition of Hot Chocolate sauce on top of the ball, we watched in amazement as the ball began to melt away, a shell melting away uncovering a hidden secret, a small ball of cake/ice cream to steal the show.

A great but long day in the Capital was to be just one of the highlights of a brilliant weekend in Blighty. Sunday brought more culinary escapades, having the opportunity to taste the infamous Bilton Sunday Roast; Hung Shou Shi being the main event of the dinner, 5 yorkshire puddings and 3 plates later and i was ready for a relax after a busy of meeting the family and family friends, a late morning drink in the garden with Nana, Auntie Jo and Uncle Tony, David and of course Mike, Linda, and the missus, and then heading off to the pub, for the baptism of fire, dropped amongst family friends, all lovely, but all intimidating, kids galore, and although at first seemingly a daunting experience, a great afternoon amongst great people :)

Monday came too soon, having to leave Essex was horrible after such a fantastic weekend, and fate told me i should have stayed! A nightmare of a day, firstly having to have my bag fully searched, all clothes out all checked, after the fine art of packing it that morning had taken around half an hour, so a 30 minute delay there before i could head to my gate, which on arrivaal provided me wih a lovely gift..... a reciept for checking in my bag as it had to be weighed for the first time ever and was over the limit :( Then discovering that i could have stayed longer as the short, flabby, wrinkly old Dragon Lady had put our presentation back from the 11th to the 30th, just adding to my nightmare, but they do say bad luck comes in three's ey?!

SO a great two weeks it had almost been, monday ruining a seemingly endless run of good luck and good times. Fear not though, wether it be good luck or bad, you can be sure that you will find out about every last bit right here :)

Happy Blogging :)

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Happy Endings...

Afternoon Bloggers,

Don't we all find it difficult, To be seperated only by a computer screen and a camera, but which actually represents hundreds or thousands of miles. Distance makes the heart grow fonder after all.

What am i talking about? Let me start where it all takes off.... the beginning.

They say you can't rush brilliance, but maybe you can... How can you meet someone, and then a few days later know that they may be perfect? Its a diffcult equation, full of lies, deceit, sneaking around and of course... Romance. A story set for Hollywood. A story to define a generation.

A brave young lad, a damsel in distress, a scary older sister, a protective brother-like mate, suspicion and deceit made it a very interesting week in Cádiz. A week that changed a lot of things, a lot of friendships, and made it one of, if not THE best week since i came over here.

Let me paint you a picture, a picture of life in Cádiz prior to this week....

There were the guys, new guys, and old guys, people here from September and those who have been here since Christmas. All friends, some romances, some friction between friends. All quite beautiful, all quite perfect. A brilliant life, an easy life, a year in the sun, an adventure throughout.

The Week was to follow the middle of the week before... am i starting to sound like Rebecca Black?! Anyway... The week before, oh how we enjoyed it!!! Copa Mundial 2.... A thrilling tournament, nail-biting entertainment and amazing support. So near yet so far... A loss against France in the opening group game gave us the kick up the arse we needed, and with 4 goals in 2 games we breezed past Spain and Italy into the semi-finals. But these were a different challenge. Finishing second in our group meant meeting, like usual, Germany in the Semis.... oh dear :( Lacking optimism, brimming with pride, we went into the game with our heads held high, and our arses clenched.... We battled to a spectacular 1-0 victory sealing our place in the final vs France. Would we get our revenge? Unfortunately not.... but we came so close... 1-0 down, then i made a boo boo, the worlds most spectacular own goal, leaving Ash helpless, and we were 2-0, i crawled off the pitch close to tears and head in my hands.... Then came the fightback, inspiration struck, the roar of the crowd, the roar of the three lions. And 2-1 came, a scrambled goal, a scrappy finish, just what we needed, just what we deserved. A fairytale ending? Afraid not... A quick break, a cracking finish and we found ourselves 3-1 down with 7 minutes remaining... 7 minutes were not enough, with 1 to spare i grabbed a brilliant header to make it 3-2 from a perfect Matty Stevens ball.... after a 7 minute bombardment, the keeper seemingly blessed by god, and the goal almost inpenetrable..... we lost. But we had our pride intact, but the French, cocky as ever, had won the Cádiz World Cup, and our supporters and ourselves headed home, sad and dissapointed at what could have been.

Drinks ensued, two days of boozing, lets call it 'drinking our sorrows away', but it wasnt jsut sadness we drank away. We had much to celebrate, comign 2nd out of 8 teams from around the world we won a bottle of whisky, and i, myself, named Ballon D'or (player of the tournament) after bagging myself 5 goals during the competition, beating the French to the prize just :) A bottle of rum was the prize, shots of both would take over the night.... A sign of things to come from the week ahead...

The week was as every other week goes, uni, drinking, and of course the beeeeach. Amazing weather to start of an amazing week. It hit heights of 34 degrees during a roasting week spent avoiding work, sipping on drinks with the sun in our faces, and then, when the winds died down, hitting the beach, towel in hand, smile on face. Then our Katie had visitors.

Katie Bilton, one of my best friends over here, mine and Matty's sister :) One little problem....

So Katie's family came over, amaaaazing family, especially Nana, 84 and living life to the full, sunning it up in Spain without a care in the world. Then Mummy and Daddy Bilton, amazing people, topping of an amazing family :) Oh and of course her little sister.... Claire. Oh yes. Claire :)

After having her drunken way with 2 numpties ;), Claire finally got third time lucky :p Sneaking around, trying to hide it from Katie, i was quickly starting to realise that this beautiful Essex girl was something special :) Standard techniques..... The Notebook came in handy, okay so maybe i was taking the 'Look after my little sister' thing a bit too far. But there was something about her, something alot of people cant and dont understand. 4 years isn't alot. :) Beautiful, Funny, (not gonna say Intelligent babe, sorry, i just can't lie to all these people) Mature, and crazy about me :) What more could i ask for? Some call it weird, some call it adorable, i call it perfect :)

Like to protagonists in a fairy tale sparks flew, i the handsome prince, her the ugly frog ;) or was that supposed to be the other way around.....! School playground flirting tactics, you know the drill, bring them down to your level, knock their self esteem out of the park, distinguish any chances of saying no, and them bam, bring out the charm :)

This obviously was the highlight of the week, obtaning the impossible. Breaking the rules :/ Crapping myself, What would Katie say? Would Mr Bilton have my knackers in a vice? Nope, no worries. Ginger charm prevailed. Katie, although not thrilled understand the scenario. The attraction was impossible to ignore.

But all good things must come to an end surely?.... Well not exactly, liek the end of a chapter in a book of our lives, Claire had to fly home. They say its so hard to say goobye. They are right. Like a Holiday romance it was seemingly dissapearing at the rate of her train pulling away from Cádiz. But all wasn't lost. She left with a sad face and a hoodie of mine. I left with a sad face and the memories of the last week, brilliant memories, but we were looking forward.

Forgive me LADS for i have sinned. To all those lads i have loved and lost in England, to my LadTag, to those messy nights out with the boys on the prowl... i say goodbye.... A missus on my arm, a smile on my face! Facebook official and i was a very happy guy. Too soon? Balls to that!! Not a day too soon!!

Claire Bilton. The Missus :) The Luckiest Girl In The World ;)

But we aren't here to hog the limelight.... Other romances blossomed this week. Friendships evolved.

We all made 3 new friends this week. We welcomed Mike, Sam and Dan to the group. 3 brilliant guys. 1 brilliant week. And what was on the horizon.... A newly single Laura, out of a long, torid relationship, once again... and our Dan, the man from Brazil, the man about the town. A perfect match :) The two beautifully vein drunkards, enticed by Dinner Jazz and Cointreau shots, another fairytale ending? I know both parties wish so...

A week and a half to remember, times we will never forget. New friends, and more.

So what ensues for me bloggers? Well a lonely time in the flat over Easter, but with friends over from Madrid this weekend, and the return of housemates next week, and then on the 6th of May.... after what will have been far too long, i will be in Essex, with the Bilton family and the beautiful Claire :)

Happy Blogging :)

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Cádiz Goes To The Movies

Afternoon Bloggers,

Someone told me something very scary today (quite apt after watching 3 horror films in the last 3 days), my English Literature tutor told me that we only have around 4 teaching weeks of University left here in Cádiz.... wow!! That isnt many, and yes on top of this we have Easter holidays and then the exam period that stretches through the end of May and throughout June, but the day to day banter of University life and lessons here has only 4 weeks remaining. Scary indeed.

Its hard to believe that my year in Cádiz is that close to being over, trust me, blink and you'll probably miss it. But all good things come to an end... right? Wrong, the greatest of events, the most memorable fo victories, the most thrilling rides are forever preserved in film, yes stories are tld slightly different with the tinseltown twinkle put on them, but this is how you truly keep the memories of the great times you have had.

Where am i going with this, why Hollywood of course!.... No not really you wally, but i am allowing you to follow me and my imagination down the rabbit hole for a snapshot at Cádiz Erasmus the Movie (hopefully to come after the book i will one day finish writing!... a guy can dream!). Cast, Character plots and of course, just for good measure, a few snide, sarcastic, and down right hilarious comments from me to come :) So get comfy, grab the popcorn, and allow yourself and your imagination to come on a journey with me :)

Mathew Clarke - Protagonist (Of course)
To be played by none other than Daniel Craig, my character will lead the charge throughout the film, acting as narrator for the tale and of course getting involved in some brilliant stories along the way. I did debate the use of Leo DiCaprio or Morgan Freeman for the role, both with soothing voices for the narration and the acting prowess to capture my complex character. But Daniel's ability to play any role and his history with Cádiz meant that he was the perfect choice.... however i do look better in Speedos ;)

Mattys Stevens
A maniac in a minature mould. Matty is hilarious but not in your run of the mill slapstick comedy way, no Matty tends to steer along the dark humour track. He drinks alot, and suffers alot. With a doting missus on his arm and the world at his feet, Matty a lad about Cai, everybody knows of him, and everybody wants to associate with him, well that is unless he's been on the Eristoff!! Tom Cruise fits perfectly into his little shoes. When Tom does comedy its true black somedy, dark and delicious, whilst still maintaining his usual Cruise swagger, perfect for the Stevens role.

Kellie Westerman
The perfect casting?.... Elizabeth Banks of Scrubs and Zack and Miri Make a Porno fame, Kellie's character will need to be portrayed in the mellow, moody style we all know, but also able to show the hilarious and romantic side to her that we have all come to prefer.

Michael McPherson
Bradley Cooper will take up the mantle of playing the challenging role of Mike. Struggling with an Ego the size of Africa, and the stubbornness of a mule, Mike's character will have to be able to present the same facade Mike puts on to the world, whilst be able to show the vulnerable, romantic, 'am i good enough' side that is hiding under the surface...

Geoffrey
A big gamble, but giving Keano Reaves his break back onto the big screen should pay off given his portfolio. Able to play a wide range of roles means Keano is perfect to shoulder the responsibility of unravelling the personality of Geoff. A year younger than everone else here, Geoff is often looking to make his mark. Vastly intelligent and kind, the character will come across with the well understood French ego, but the audience will be able to see his true colours come through.

Sam Maloney
Only appearing in half the film, Sam's character must have a big star to play him to leave the impact that he sure did on our group here. After much deliberation between the two Paul Rudd was eventually chosen as the right person to face the challenge, winning out over Hangover 1 and 2 and Role Models star Ken Jeong. Rudd was seen as the right choice to portray Sam's camp, naive nature whilst still being able to grab the audiences by the balls and make them laugh their asses off.

Katie Bilton
Much thought had to go into the casting of this role. Her kind, homely, motherly personality must be apparent, whilst her party-animal and sex-driven inner diva must also be accurately captured throughout. After her fall from grace after the naked pictures fiasco, Vanessa Hudgens went from High School Musical goody two-shoes, to every guys wet dream, finding roles coming easier, and her target audience average age increasing everyday. Her ability to play both the sultress and the loving missus, makes Vanessa and ideal choice to play our favourite Italian Lover.

Kate Newman
An earlier than expected exit from Cai for Kate means that her character, like Sam's must be capable of having the desired effect in a shorter period of time. The big boobs and big attitude meant that this was simply a no-brainer. Pamela Anderson making her way back into the limelight with the desired impact here.

Sarah Bailey
Romance, Heartache, Laughter and Tears are all in a days work for our Posh Totty. With a bark as bad as her bite, and a heart as big as her opinions she is a lovely lass as long as your aren't watching a film with her! Kind and considerate whilst having an attitude and flirty side that could take down most. An easy choice was to allow Katherine Hiegl perhaps get away from starring in films that make you want to gauge out your eyes and drive a huge Monster truck whilst bbq-ing the worlds biggest steak just to gain back a little masculinity that the last hour and a half of watching her film tore out of your life.

Bee Heal
Rather Posh is our southern Jessy. When not on Daddy's Yatch, or sipping champagne with Jeeves, Bee enjoys nothing more than sun-burning, and dancing the night away with all the Cai gang. A lovely girl with little bad to say about anyone. Always will let her opinion be known, but rarely ruffles feathers with what is said. It was a struggle to find someone to play Bee's character, but if I could get anyone to do it, of course it makes sense that it would be Audre Hepburn in the prime of her life.

Natasha Pitt
Our favourite Rock n Roll chick with the biggest motherly side out of everbody that has graced our Cádiz lives. The last of our leavers Tash could be challenging you to a drink off one moment and then in the blink of an eye could be mopping up your sick and making sure you get home, tucked up, safe and sound. A safe choice was to cast Mila Kunis as our farm girl. Already one of the mistresses of comedy Mila can play both the good girl and the bad girl, and so is perfect to capture both sides of Tash's loving personality.

Maisie Kennady
Cockney to the core, a broader accent than Phil Mitchell, Maisie is a mad little hatter, a personality the size of the Americas and a sense of fun a frolics to match. Studious and sensible when necessary, but in an instant can let her hair down and after a few Sangrias is down those Apples and Pears and off to a bar to dance the night away. Only one actress seemingly parties as well as Maisie and that would be Lindsay Lohan. Seen playing both the party animal and the academic, Lohan could perfectly portray maisie's brilliance.
Ash Milns
Big Ash, the daydreamer, the man-whore on a dry patch. He would just love to have the brilliant Gerrard Butler cast in the role, however, where Ash falters is that Gerrard is a true lad, with the record and pure appeal to back up his dreams and materialistic strut. Ash you could say, has the gear but no idea. Surrounding himself with top of the line technology and other materialistic goods, Ash unfortunately falls short when it comes to stepping up to the plate. An awkward flirt and hilarious perve, his charm is little more than boyish, but where he lacks in charm, he makes up in gear and intelligence. Jake Gyllenhaal seems a much better fit. With the right all action look, but the same child-like-charm that Ash boasts to accompany it.
James Southam
James is the first of our newcomers, with a quiet facade, James is easy to talk to, however is always up for a laugh and banter, getting involved in most group madness, drinking when possible, and being very much one of the lads. A rocker look, but with a calm as a millpond demeanor, James' perfect casting would be Vince Vaughan the big man, with the big personality and all the hilarity, just waiting under the surface to be unleashed.

Dave Smith
After seriously debating Will Ferrel for the role, it became obvious that not only the funn side of our human version of Balloo had to be captured, but also his loveable, mellow side which see's him as someone anyone can talk to and depend on. An actor that can play both the good guy, and the hilarious guy is of course the genius Seth Rogen. A real lad, but also a brilliant person, loveable and kind as well as being up for a laugh at the drop of a hat.... pity he is a Yid!

James L
After unfortunately having to go against my instincts and not cast Luke Chadwick in the role, deciding to settle for the brilliant Elijah Wood was perhaps the genius i was waiting for! Perfect for the role Elijah has the mild, mellow air that James boasts, whilst also being a joker and never far from a laugh.

Laura Payne
Our very own little Payne in the ass. Laura can manage to annoy you and give you the biggest grin on your face within a matter of words. She has an English rose appeal to her, but through sporting the short hair she tones it down. Much like the wondefuln Keira Knightley who is more than capable of capturing both the intlligent, witty and beautiful side of Laura, whilst also maintaining the attitude that ensures you never want to be on her wrong side.... trust me, even after two bottles of Rosé she can be very scary!

Lucy Robinson
Our very own exotic sulstress. Lucy is intleligent and talented, and realises it, her good grasp of several languages as well as her aptitude for music and dance only adding to her ever growing ego. I guess you could say its a French thing, for although she may not have any French inside her (except when her and Olivier are together :p) she embraces all things parisian, above all the Parisian air and way of acting. Our half Indian mistress is both bold and brutal, capable of taking a joke or insult with one hand, and within a breath, sending one back your way with the other. Frida Pinto is of course the obvious choice for Lucy, an elegant and engrossing actress, able to portray both the strong-willed front Lucy puts on, whilst also achieving the timidness that comes with her fear of not being accepted, or able to fit into a life.
Clodagh Ryan
Our very own Paddy straight off the plane from China. Alot of Irish are travellers in one sense of the word, but Clodagh's version if one of a globetrotter, studying in China and Cádiz as part of her year abroad. She is wise to the world around her but maintains a deeper innocence that gives her a quaint Irish charm. Able to be very understanding and stubborn in the same breath, Codagh will make sure she is heard, whilst allowing those around her to have their say also. Gemma Arterton may come as a surprise to some, but with the different roles she has played she is able to put across a stubborn, yet innocent feel to her character with ease.

With a golden cast lining up in the starring roles, there of course are plots needed to back up the glittering bill:

- The birth of Kike
- Ash 'Getting Around' the group
- Many mad nights out including the last one before Christmas (Free Bar)
- The Italian nightmares
- Granada! The fun, the frolics, and of course Mike's nakes torso.... puke over
- Football Fiascos
- A certain Rosé fueled night
- Oh and who could forget Ash's wonderful night with the police and his 'Little accident'

The final piece of the puzzle would of course have to be a killer soundtrack:

- Yo No Quiero Agua by Pitbull --> One of the most memorable tracks to go together with this year abroad
- Hero by Enrique ---> Mike singing it to Kellie to seduce her (fiction)
- New York New York being sung on many drunken stumbles home by myself and Ash (fact)
- Tonight (I'm F***ing You) by Enrique ---> sang and danced to by Ash on one of his many prowls
- Marry You by Bruno Mars ---> Another Granada song
- Let Me Love You by Mario ---> A legendary song revived on many a pre-drinking sesh
- Numero Uno ----> The surprisingly catchy Italian anthem that rocked many a party after its introduction
- Time of Our Life (Dirty Bit) --> rubbish song, but the words sum up a brilliant year.

Yes this was just a trivial blog, i had fun writing true and mabe some slightly false things about people, what do you expect, i love to a) stir, b) entertain and c) make saracstic, hilarious comments, teetering on social boundaries! But don't forget one thing, time in Cádiz is nearly over, people will move on and people will be sadly missed and alot sadly forgotten. Lives will go on and it will just be a bittersweet memory in the past. Its moments like this that we will tell our kids and grandkids about, days spent on the beach, nights spent in bars, and if this helps people remember the good times and the bad, cheer up someones evening, or maybe just put a smile on their face, well then job done.

To those who are not in it, its not because you arent important, quite the opposite, i don't have enough time, or your patience to go on much longer (and this is my fifth attempt to write this as blogger played up and deleted it four times before!!!) Just to say to everyone who has been a part of this adventure as we head into the last months, thankyou, you have contributed to making this the best year of mine, and what i expect to be everyone elses lives. Top Job.

Now you sad Jeb-Ends, stop being mushy and go enjoy yourselves, times running out!!!

Happy Blogging :)

P.s Check the boxes, leave comments, make me smile toooooo :D

Just Smile And Eat Your Ice Cream...

Afternoon Bloggers,

Wow! Some very good views of the last entry, as always i thank you all for sparing a bit of time to read my rant and raves :)

This week, well i say week, its been almost 2 weeks since we last spoke, and in that time what have i done? Iv been in England :) And being in England of course means lots of eating, drinking anf being merry!!

To save youselves reading the same stuff over and over, here il keep it brief (yes i know, this is a first haha!) After leaving Newcastle behind, and of course some great people who i may not see for a while, and some maybe never again, (The brilliant Jumbo, The dude that is Lish, The pest himself Sparky, Dangerously dumb Dave, Lish's missus Sophie, the girl next door Denise, The LAD Craigy boy, My loving sister Tori and her very kind and hospoitable housemates Hannah and Nikki, and of course i couldnt forget the Warbler Becky, Lauren O'Whore and Anna along with the rest of the Cast of RENT, who all together, yes every single one of you :) Made my stay in Newcastle, however brief, one to remember for a long time! (if i forgot anyone mehhh get over it :p ) ) I then moved downwards, to the every lovely land of Donny; ChavVegas, and back to my family and friends who i left behind some three months earlier.

But of course back to Donny doesn't just mean back to family and friends, oh no, it means back to the slog that is a Donny lifestyle; football, drinking, long days in front of the tv and xbox and of course, having to eat allllll that amazing English grub... nom nom nom. Back to the smiling faces of the brother Chris, Little Luke, Shit-Hair Simon, Tramp-look-a-like Matty, Mahoooooosive armed Mazza and Viiiiiiiile Mellor for a wonderful night on the tiles to mark mine and other uni goers return to the Donx for one weekend only. As brilliant as it was, the cold was getting to me, and as the week went on, it was only the football, tv and food that was saving me from the English weather (no 15 degrees isnt warm you nit-wits!!!)

Friday marked a very special day, as the family got together at the Keepmoat stadium to celebrate the 80th birthday of my Grandad, a quiet soul he didn't want all the fuss, but with 102 people to please, he went along with it and as everyone enjoyed their meals, champagne, wine and dancing, the night went swimmingly and i got well and truly steaming, with another night on the donny tiles to follow the do at the Keepmoat. In between dancing ridiculously embarassingly with the family, necking drink after drink and singing We're Jamming rather audibly into a Bob Marley look-a-likes face, i do believe i had a rather good night as we staggered in at 4a.m expecting a raging hangover to dominate an other wise expectadly good Saturday.

45 quids orth of KFC and an average England performance later and i was over the state i was in the night before and looking forward to getting back to Cai. One last thing to do.... more travelling.

As i had been expecting to be dropped off at Stanstead by my Dad on Monday, waking up Sunday to him discussing abandoning me in London with my Uncle Dave and Daniel for me to get the bus over to stanstead monday morning and save hime a 7hour round trip did come as some surprise..... but make the most out of situations is something i find i am rather good at, and a few texts and a beautiful dinner at Black and Blue later and i found myself on the bus over to Bond Street to meet one rather lovely lady, for some rather lovely Haagen Dazs... eventually! When you want a night to go smoothly what can you always rely on? Public transport to bals it up for you!...

Heading to Holland Park tube station i was greeted with a big no can do, closed, brilliant.... so Notting Hill Station was the next port of call, five minute walk up the road, bareable... just. But a phone call from my Uncle as i was about to head down the steps stopped me in my tracks and saw me crossing the road to grab a bus as the circular line managed to be closed as far as Marble Arch the only day of the year i wanted to use it. But as i gritted my teeth and kept out the cold with my three layers i waited begrudgingly for the bus and headed into central.

Greeted by a cheeky grin across the road, all the trouble had been worth seeing that beautiful smile :) Nattt. (bit cheesey!!) And as we walked down Bond street chatting we became well aware that we were indeed walking away from Central, where we did indeed want to be. But eventually, after of course i got us semi-lost looking for Ed's easy Diner, we settled for Haagen Dazs, and after some beautiful ice cream, great coversation and some odd looks from the waiters we were back in the cold, and i was back on the bus, smile on my face.... dreading a day of travelling tomorrow, but safe in the mind that England had once again done me well.

The best thing that came out of Monday? All the chocolate i managed to get over with me, a rather hilarious Air Host, and the luck of the transport being just on time for each next stage.... thank god!! But rounding off the day in the mild Cadiz night with a few bevvies and some good company meant that i was more than happy to be back in Spain, back to the sunshine and blue skies.

Tuesday and Wednesday were happily written off as beach days, Tomorrows 9am will be the wake up call!! But seeing everyone back, even if we did lose embarassingly badly to the Italians, and i did get a nice headache from a stray Alessio elbow, i was happy to be back amongst the great people of Cadiz, and happy to be back to my little Spanish adventure.

Happy Blogging :)

(and of course guys, you dont even need to ask, just go ahead leave comments, tick the boxes, you needn't be members, and the ticking is anonymous!!) :)