Lonely Hearts

Afternoon Bloggers,

So upon the request of quite a few people i thought i would take a moment out of my busy schedule (Dissertation, Work and of course managing Chelsea are keeping me very busy!!) and write to all my lovely followers.

It has been quite some time since we last spoke, since my rant which i apologise for to those who i may have hurt, but my reasons were pure. I have since become single, turned 22 and kicked the first semester of final year's ass :) so there have been some ups and downs!! However today i think it's time to reflect, to consider what we have, and think of those who have not.

Those who truly know me, the real me, know me to be among other things a people person. If i were to describe myself in one sentence it would have to be a lanky, ginger, happless romantic who surrounds himself with people and loves to have the attention every now and again ;). Now there may be those who dissagree, there may even be those who wholy agree. However, this is how i see me. Ambitious and driven perhaps, charming and witty maybe, but the above sentence is the core of me, without the facades, without illusions, me, stripped.

But there are times, even for me who many consider to be a 'people person', where i find myself sat on my bed, staring at my computer screen, missing people, and being as a whole, pretty lonely. My parents are just on the end of a telephone line as are other family members including my older sister, whilst my younger sister resides a mere 20 minute walk away. Facebook tells me i have 984 friends, probably around a third of whom are also living in Newcastle, so loneliness should be a million miles away.

However, why do i find myself feeling that way at times? Perhaps it is because i, like many others, take what i have for granted. The people we are closest to we often treat poorly, and we forget how lucky we are to have them around us. Recently a poor girl from my hometown of Doncaster was murdered, she was by herself in a park after being stabbed on her way to meet her friends. She herself had to ring the police and report the crime, she soon died of the fatal wounds. Do i deserve to allow myself to feel lonely when i am fortunate enough to have a world of friends and family so close?

The answer is no, I would be stupid to truly consider myself alone, Casey was alone when she was stabbed, the poor girl was alone in the middle of a park as she was cruely taken away from her friends and family.

I turned 22 exactly a month ago, I spent a long weekend celebrating turning old and wrinkly with some of the best people around. My friends helped me to get plastered beyond belief. In the process i got lamped by a girl, which gave me a beautiful black lip! Spilt numourous drinks on lovely new clothing, wandered to previously unknown parts of both my drunken states and Newcastle! And not forgetting of course, managed to keep drinking beyond those days and make myself lovely and ill!!

I truly believe there can be moments, when we are away from family, when we are bored, that our minds can wander, wander off into devoid scenarios, where it feels we have nothing to do, and nobody to do it with. However, it is these times that i say to you, take those pensive moments and put them to good use. Think about those less fortunate; the homeless people with nowhere to live. The mothers in Africa who have to watch their children die because they have no money for healthcare. The soldiers dying in hospitals thousands of miles for home protecting our freedom, and even Casey, as she lie there in Doncaster, fighting for her life, with nobody there to tell her it was going to be alright. I ask you, use these solitary moments of reflection to remember those we have lost, and those who sit alone, with nothing and no-one, for it is these people who are truly lonely, you, well you are just having a bad day.

Chin Up.